The experts on TV who talk about the BP oil leak remind me of George Costanza claiming to be a marine biologist.
“The sea was angry that day, my friends.”
Since most of us are not drilling experts, the entirety of the information that we are hearing and repeating is no more fact based than a game of telephone. The only certainty is that the situation in the Gulf is very bad and getting worse.
If this whole BP mess doesn’t make you angry, you’re just not paying attention.
“Like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli.”
The solutions that the actual “experts” have come up with read like the consensus of a third grade focus group: Big Box, Top Hat, Junk Shot. Seriously, are these the limits of our collective innovation?
Like Costanza’s beached whale, they have proposed clogging the blow hole with golf balls.
“What is that, a Titleist?”
This unremarkable solution is offered, by those who are paid to know these things, as the next best alternative.
“Easy, big fella.”
My question:
If the goal is to plug the leak, why don’t they actually plug the leak?
I can’t wait until they have exhausted all of their MacGyver inspired contrived notions in favor of an actual plug, like the one in this test tube.
BP can even take the extra precaution of securing the plug in place with duct tape to guarantee that it holds.
This suggestion may not turn out to be the best solution, but I’m no expert.
Whatever it is that they choose to do, I wish that they would hurry up and do it.
If the leak continues much longer, describing this incident as a catastrophe will be an understatement.
Author Bio:
Ray Colon has written 136 posts on Ray's Blog.
He works with numbers for a living, but don't judge - boring accountants need love too. His blog has no niche (unless writing about things that are important to him is a niche). Some folks cringe when he gets “all political” on them, but he does it anyway when he's in that kind of mood. Sometimes, he writes something nice about someone, but you shouldn't get used to that. His first book, the one he hasn't written yet, is not available on Amazon. Subscribe to Ray's Blog via RSS or Email.
{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
Totally agree with you. They are experts, yes experts in making money no matter what.
Thanks Maria,
Oh yes, they are definitely experts at that. Hopefully, some of their hefty profits will be used to compensate those who are being affected, without the victims having to go to court and wait 20 years. Ray
Duct tape isn’t a bad idea. Ever watch Mythbusters?
I just think America thrives on controversy and the sob story. If they plugged up the hole what would reporters have to talk about? Fixing the problem is less exciting than coming up with MacGyver techniques that most likely will not work. America must be entertained therefore let’s kill the environment in the name of entertainment.
Hi Tristan, so now we have two votes for duct tape.
Mythbusters? Yes, I’ve seen it. They use a lot of it, when they’re not busy blowing things up!
People do enjoy their drama and scandal, and the media doesn’t hold back in delivering that type of news, but I can’t connect what BP is doing (or not doing) to America’s love of being entertained. Now if we are talking about the seemingly annual Miss USA controversy or anything else having to do with celebrity, I’m with you 100%.
The latest from the slick is that they’ve managed to capture 20% of the continuing gushing oil. Somehow, that news didn’t make me want to get up and do a dance of joy. Probably because twenty percent rarely, if ever, signals success at anything. Ray